I think it may be time to leave my church, but I do not want to do it badly or burn anything down. How do I know, and how do I go?

“And Abram said unto Lot, Let there be no strife, I pray thee, between me and thee, and between my herdmen and thy herdmen; for we be brethren. Is not the whole land before thee? separate thyself, I pray thee, from me: if thou wilt take the left hand, then I will go to the right; or if thou depart to the right hand, then I will go to the left.”

Abram and Lot had grown too large to share the same land and their herdsmen were fighting over water. Abram raises it directly, refuses to let it harden into a feud, and then gives his younger nephew first choice of the country. The separation happens, and it happens without either man destroying the other. Scripture shows parting as sometimes necessary, and it pays very close attention to how it is done.

“And the contention was so sharp between them, that they departed asunder one from the other: and so Barnabas took Mark, and sailed unto Cyprus; And Paul chose Silas, and departed, being recommended by the brethren unto the grace of God.”

Paul and Barnabas disagreed sharply over John Mark, could not resolve it, and parted to work separately. Luke does not tidy the story up or tell you which of them was right, and both men went on doing the work. It is one of the more honest passages in the New Testament about Christians who cannot stay in the same room. Leaving is not automatically failure, and it is not automatically right either.