I genuinely believe God forgives other people. I cannot believe he has forgiven me. How do I actually take that in?

“Who is a God like unto thee, that pardoneth iniquity, and passeth by the transgression of the remnant of his heritage? he retaineth not his anger for ever, because he delighteth in mercy. He will turn again, he will have compassion upon us; he will subdue our iniquities; and thou wilt cast all their sins into the depths of the sea.”

Micah closes a book full of judgment with a question about who God even is, and answers it with an image of sins thrown into the depths of the sea. He is writing to a people who had every reason to expect the opposite ending. The wonder in the phrasing matters here: even the prophet who delivered the warnings finds the mercy hard to credit. You are in reasonable company.

“And you, being dead in your sins and the uncircumcision of your flesh, hath he quickened together with him, having forgiven you all trespasses; Blotting out the handwriting of ordinances that was against us, which was contrary to us, and took it out of the way, nailing it to his cross;”

Paul writes to a young church being pressured with rules and rituals as the route to being acceptable. His picture is of a legal document listing everything held against them, taken away and nailed to the cross. The debt is not reduced or deferred, it is cancelled. Notice the tense he uses: this is described as something already done, not something waiting on your ability to feel it.